How My Childhood Led Me To Work At A Children’s Mental Health Charity | by Emily Patel

Having a disabled twin sibling has shaped me as an adult by influencing some of my most positive relationships, and indirectly my career path. Put quite simply, it has made me the person I am today. I owe much of this influence to the inclusive environment I was raised in and since then, to my rich and empowering experiences as an adult. In this blog, I’ll talk about what exactly I learned from my childhood experiences. 

The Value of Advocacy

As the youngest of three – yet more like the middle child, fiercely independent and even-tempered - I happily took on an advocate role for my deaf twin brother. Who knew that taking on that role then would shape me as an adult and later my career? As a child I regularly spoke up for my brother where I felt a ‘hearing voice’ would helpfully provide him with a gateway to the hearing world. In return, I gained an understanding of deaf culture and an appreciation for the way that he navigated a world not built for his disability.

I am forever in awe of the barriers that so many overcome and am grateful that my awareness and understanding of disabilities extend beyond 'deafness'. With my grassroots understanding of the value of advocacy, you can appreciate why I now spend my working days in Communications and Marketing for a Children's Mental Health charity.

The Power of Community

While I watched my twin sibling find his place and thrive within the deaf community, I learned the importance and value of community. Community helps us develop our identity, which is so important to our wellbeing, confidence, and making friends with others we can relate to.
From my own experience, my family and I were regularly involved in community groups. As a young family, they offered us respite and a space to connect with others who were, in some way, facing similar challenges.  The support we received not only gave me a sense of belonging but also created memories that I still fondly look back on today.

All of this results in a natural optimism, opening us up to people from different backgrounds. I regularly champion a peer support group for young people as I know the benefit of being immersed within a relatable community - free from judgment.

The Importance of Relationships

Growing up I regularly pondered emotionally complex questions – a part of being an ‘overthinker and worrier’ as much as being a twin to a disabled sibling. My pondering came at challenging times, like my transition to secondary school and my brothers to a different boarding school. I questioned then ‘why he was deaf, and I was not.’ Our lives were bonded, yet through our differences, we were apart.
I discovered that developing valuable relationships was key to helping me grow emotionally at these difficult stages of life, and one that I have enjoyed immensely with my curious mind. If you are wondering, I still have the same friendship groups today!

My first job after university was an action-packed three years of living and working alongside a team of multi-cultural crew on board cruise liners. The environment was intense and hardworking for all, yet our similarities and differences – a mutual love of travel, our backgrounds, and cultures - kept the experience enjoyable and ripe for learning and personal growth.

Since my working life returned to land, many of my roles led me to the children’s mental health charity I work for today. Here I have learned how important healthy relationships are to our wellbeing. I believe that my past, new, and current relationships have positively influenced my choices and decisions and that equally, the diversity of them has provided me with a welcome resource to draw from professionally.

Lived Experience

The essence of my childhood and the communities that I identified with ultimately led me to my current communications/advocacy role - lending my voice to those who, for various reasons, may not be able to express theirs. Yet it was my ensuing experiences as an adult, and the diversity of relationships formed, that has further reinforced my choice to support ‘inspirational people navigating a world not built for them’. 

Along the way, I have learnt that positive relationships are the essence of who we are. As a child, I was not aware of this, but through lived experiences and by placing value on the ‘happy times’, I learned to not just build positive relationships with others, but also with myself - this is after all, the most important relationship of all. 
 

Emily Patel is a Data Literacy apprentice at Multiverse based in Essex, UK. She’s writing for the Apprentice Lens as part of the Blogging Team. Here’s more about her:

'Hi, I’m Emily, Marketing and Communications Manager for the charity Kids Inspire. I write and tell real-life stories for a living but made a promise to myself to blog outside of work for my own well-being. This is the start of that promise and I hope to capture the interest of readers along the way.'