Public Speaking and Owning the Stage | by Bryony Michaelson
POV: Your manager has just told you that you are to present at a company-wide meeting next week. Even if this isn’t your first time owning the stage, as the days go by and your airtime draws nearer, the nerves begin to seep in. Again.
If you’re reading this and can identify, even if only marginally, read on. I am not suggesting that we will present like Michelle Obama by the time you get to the bottom of the page, but perhaps consider some of the ideas and concepts below the next time the opportunity arises for you.
1) Identify the Nerves
Call them out. Give them a name. Understand where the nervousness is coming from. Take some time to reflect on them, and why they are beginning to preoccupy you.
For example, one of my nerves when public speaking has been around the fear of “coming across as a flappy mess”.
Why have I thought that? Has a manager or a colleague ever told me, “Hey, I couldn’t understand the point you were making because you were too incoherent in that presentation” - No.
What does “being flappy” mean to me then? As I reflect on this as I write, I think it’s more the sensation I have felt, rather than how I felt I have come across. OK. So, what does this “sensation” mean? Perhaps it’s the “rush” of trying to get my message out there, and the pressure I have put on myself to make every point clear and impactful. Perhaps it’s not. The point is, I have started to reflect on why I have felt, and still at times continue to feel this way.
Once you start to reflect on where the nerves come from, you can start to reframe your once “Self-Limiting Beliefs” as something you can own. Challenge yourself, and make that once limiting belief become an empowering one.
2) Finding Your Authentic Voice
What does authenticity mean to you? When do you feel most authentic as a communicator?
A few years ago, I attended a course at RADA called the “Voice of Influence”. It was one of the most valuable trainings I have ever attended, and I came away from it with a whole catalogue of practical tools to use when faced with public speaking opportunities.
One tool was around “acting as the host.” Imagine the situation: you are hosting a dinner party. As each guest knocks on the door, how do you welcome them? How do you want them to feel? How do you allow them to “enter” your world? Take their jacket, get them a drink, and make them feel “at home”. Now, think of your “stage” (or the other side of the screen) as your “home” - this has really helped me - by acting as the host, I am not only engaging more with my audience but I feel like I am authentically doing so.
Viv Groslop talks a lot about adopting Happy High Status in her book “How to Own the Room” (and has dedicated her new book wholly to it). It is a state of mind which combines confidence and your ability to relate to your true self to enhance your presence on stage.
“Happy high status is very close to charisma. It really means being comfortable in your own skin; allowing yourself to be confident and assertive without being angry and aggressive. It allows you to say controversial things, to introduce conflict, to be argumentative, but to do so with grace and elegance.”
3) Paralinguistic Focus
What about everything else you need to consider when taking “centre stage”?
“Paralinguistic” communication - not what you say but how you say it. Think back to the last presentation/speech you attended - do you remember what they said word for word? Probably not. But do you remember how they made you feel? Most likely.
Body language. Gestures. Facial expressions. Tone and pitch of voice. Intonation. Pauses.
Look up a clip of one of the most impactful talks you have seen. Take note of each of these paralinguistic forms of communication. Take note of what makes them effective. (If nothing comes to mind, take a look at Brene Brown’s talk on Listening to Shame).
4) Be intentional about the message you want to be heard
Now, the above doesn’t deny the importance of making your point memorable and important. What is it that you want your audience to remember?
Follow this simple exercise:
- Grab a colleague/friend and summarise the overall message of your presentation/speech in one minute.
- Now repeat it, but this time for 30 seconds.
- Do it again for 15 seconds.
What did you find yourself focusing on as the time was taken from you? What were the key things you landed on? This will help you identify what you think is the most important to get across, and then you can focus on what strings the rest of your speech together.
5) Be the agent
I recently had a conversation with Data Literacy/Data & Insights for Business Decisions Coach Hannah Siaw about how she has developed confidence as a public speaker (I had told her I was a big fan after seeing how she presented on stage with such clarity and impact).
Like a lot of us, Hannah too once struggled with nervousness before going on stage. What has really helped has been the idea that we are essentially the agents delivering a message. The speech is not about us and our “imperfections”. As soon as we, as speakers, realise that our purpose is to contribute something of value to our audience, the focus becomes less about us and everything that could go wrong, and more about being rooted in the cause and the importance of the message we are there to relay.
I also really enjoyed the Community Event “Confidence and Public Speaking” with Maddie Anholt, who takes us through a multitude of self-esteem-building hacks when we are in this position of being the agent.
6) Try it: Record it, Analyse it, Repeat it
- Set a goal to try something new the next time you present. Have in mind what you want to focus on: Clarity of message? The pace of speech? Authenticity? Make your coach/manager/colleague/friend aware so you’re creating that accountability.
- If you can, make sure it is recorded.
- Yes, watching yourself back is uncomfortable. But it’s the only way to continue to develop. Draw up a table of the key themes you want to critique. What went well? What could be improved? What elements made it impactful - or, not so much?
- Progress isn’t linear! Keep repeating this process as you gradually start to own your own stage.
What other tactics/techniques have you found useful when embracing the stage as a public speaker? Please share in the comments below and like this article if you found it helpful :)
Bryony Michaelson is a Project Management Coach at Multiverse.